Article by:
Joseph C. Abraham
Earlier this month I had the good fortune of sitting with a couple whom I truly have come to love. You see, we share a passion for service. Independent of one another, we spend countless hours pouring into the Community. So, it was great to sit down for a few minutes and catch up with everything going on.
JCA: What was your inspiration for starting AK's closet?
AK: There was, at the time, the water challenge, you remember? The ice bucket challenge. Savasha Feazell (aka ‘Mz.Phit’) and I got involved in it but when we got involved in it, we found out folks were supposed to be donating money to charity, we were like “well wait, y'all just throwing water on each other and not doing anything?” So, we decided to start The Give Back Initiative, we took a bunch of waters and Gatorades, basically what we had, down near the Salvation Army. When we went down there a lot of the people were like ‘hey do you guys have XYZ items,’ and I'm thinking to myself not only do we not have that stuff, why did we just bring ourselves down here as if these people just want water and Gatorade? We didn't assess what we were giving and who we were giving to. So many people came up to me, they were like, ‘do you have socks, do you have toothbrushes, and toothpaste?’ Like we have none of that, but I said, “well you know, I can get it, I bet I can get it.” So, I left there, and I reached out to friends that I knew, other comedians, and my coworkers at Victoria's Secret, and they all gave me stuff.
I took the stuff down, and then more people asked for more stuff, and so then I put it on Facebook asking for stuff. I got a lot of stuff and then Lou mentioned it on Power 88, on The Breakdown, opened the Pearson (Dr. William U. Pearson Community Center) to be the first drop off site for it, and named it ‘AK's Closet’ all in that same moment. He saw me in my car with a bunch of clothes, like stacked up to the ceiling of the car and he thought I was being evicted. I explained to him that my mom was moving to Las Vegas, and I had all of these donations in my spare bedroom, and I needed to have somewhere to put them, and my car was all that I had. That is when he opened the Pearson for me and was like “I never even knew that you did this. How long have you been doing it?” Soon it turned to him interviewing me on the radio, like I said he named it “AK’S Closet,” and there we go.
JCA: LJ, I don’t want you to feel as though you’re being left out, so, talk to me about Mastering Mindsets. Tell me about Mastering Mindsets, first what is Mastering Mindsets?
LJ: Mastering Mindset is a youth organization that's comprised of educators, professionals, law enforcement officers, and parents. We developed a program that will provide supplemental education for our youth. The program started as a group of parents that were sitting around who had young children, who were looking at the climate when it comes to the workforce, when it came to coding, mathematics, pretty much the whole STEM movement, and what we realized, that a lot of the students, that a lot of the children in our community, don't have access to those programs to be able to learn that body of knowledge.
As parents, we looked around and we said our children have exposure to these things because we were able to put our students in better predicaments. We looked at the students that grew up just like us, and we said these students don't have access to that, what can we do to be able to bring that information to our community? As we began to discuss and talk amongst ourselves, we realized that everybody knew a doctor, everybody knew a nurse, everybody knows the engineer, everybody knows somebody that's already operating in those career fields and instead of trying to create a program or try to raise money to put our students in programs that exist, that we knew, ultimately they wouldn't be able to afford - what we wanted to do was reach out to those professionals that we already knew, and create those programs and bring them into the community for free. The main thing has always been for free.
As we started building a relationship with the community, in those students we started identifying other discrepancies and other needs within the community, especially reading. We soon realized a lot of our students can build and they're good with their hands, but they struggle with building some of the robots and doing some of the hands-on learning activities because they strictly-they just couldn't read. They couldn’t understand the directions. They couldn't read the directions and that's when we started introducing the tutoring element and that's when we started to create partnerships with other organizations like AK's closet, where now instead of trying to reinvent the wheel, we found opportunities where we can collaborate and kind of touch a bigger element, a bigger majority and more, just make a bigger impact you know, without trying to start from scratch in a nutshell.
JCA: One of our dear friends that we all share is Franklyn Verley. Talk about the role he played in your life, the impact he had on your life, and still has on your life today.
AK: It's kind of hard, it's kind of hard to describe my relationship with Franklyn in just one word, because I could say he was like a dad, I could say he was like a cool uncle, I could say that he was like the Big Brother that I never had, he’s for sure the Godfather that my son never got to meet. That bothers me probably every day.
For me, Franklyn was an anchor for pretty much every issue, not only this city has accounted for, but a lot of us as individuals. Franklyn, for as intelligent and well-traveled and well-read and educated and he had the nerve to admire me! I don’t know if anybody out there knows what it's like to have somebody that you look up to and that you think is just damn near perfect, to say that they think that you're something special, and then to have to lose that person in a time in your life when you’re supposed to be the happiest, because you're expecting your first child.
There are a lot of things that Franklyn created that we try to preserve, some stuff was out of our hands, but the thing about it is, Franklyn was more about community than he ever was about money. He was a successful person when it came to making money, but money for sure didn't make him. Franklyn was so willing to come out of his pocket if the community will benefit. I do not mean grant, not someone donated, like legit out of his own money just because he felt like the community needed it. When Franklyn found out LJ and I were a couple, that was one of the few times that I saw him smile when I could see he had missing teeth in the back.
When I told him that we were expecting our son, he cried. Then I cried when he was fighting for his life and we told him not only that we were having a boy (our gender reveal was in his backyard, we set his lawn on fire) - but that we would be honoring ourselves, honoring our son, and honoring Franklyn by giving our son Franklyn’s last name as his middle name. It just so happened that the little baby boy came kicking and screaming on the same day that Franklyn came into this world kicking and screaming so they share the name, but they also share December 27th.
JCA: One of the events that Franklyn championed that all three of us absolutely love, is Men Who Cook. Tell us about Men Who Cook and what you do with that as I try to act like I'm not tearing up.
LJ: Men Who Cook was always something Franklyn would talk about. He would always talk about the humble beginnings of its start in one of his friends’ kitchens. So, he had a friend who was a chef, and he was super nerdy. Anyway, that was the way Franklyn would describe him. With Franklyn being as charismatic as he was, and all of his successful friends would try to do introduce this guy in New York and get him on the social scene. So, they set up these small events where this guy would cook and prepare meals. They would pretty much throw a party, but he would highlight it and they would feature him as the chef.
It was their way of kind of breaking him out his shell. That's the humble beginning of it and long story short, that little party evolved into this big shindig, this big event that everybody would look forward to in New York. He would describe it and tell me: “one year, one year man, (I can't talk about Franklyn without doing my Franklyn voice) but one year man we did it in an airplane hangar it was huge.” But it eventually morphed into a fundraiser because he had a friend who was a great dancer, who ended up being in an accident where he couldn't dance, and they would do Men Who Cook as a fundraiser to raise money for his school and ultimately that's how Men Who Cook was born.
That's how it was introduced to me, and he gifted the fundraiser to Mastering Mindsets, as a fundraiser to continue to do the work that we are doing. To include Kemet in the Desert, to include all the other cultural events that he was doing and going back to what I said earlier when we talk about Mastering Mindsets, as it got more involved in the community it’s kind of morphed and started creating partnerships with other organizations that is doing amazing things. Men Who Cook is one of those things and then the cultural events that Franklyn put on. He was always about ‘I had the opportunity to have this great education and to learn these cultural things from master teachers and I always want to be able to give the community that same experience, but for free in a cultural event.’
So, I remember when I first met Franklyn, I used to read books of these different authors that I admire, and I would quote, and I would say “yeah because I read in this book….” and I would quote one of the authors and he'd be like “Oh man he officiated my wedding” “I'm like you know this guy?” So like that's how I instantly felt like Franklyn has always been a celebrity to me, like no matter what book I named, what author I named, he would pull out his phone and show me a picture with him, or say ‘Oh yeah I sat in his class in 1970 whenever’ and I'm like wait you really know these guys and he would call him on three-way and say “Hey talk to him” or “I want you to meet somebody” and I was always starstruck and didn't know what to say. In addition to all those things, Franklyn was a genius, he would joke about being Frankadamus on the radio, because he was able to predict things. But he always said “LJ you're gonna have to carry this thing” and I'll be like “no we're gonna do it together this is yours” and he would always say “no it's about the younger generation” and he was so invested into younger folks, of the AK's and myself, of the Barrios, of the Mikel’s, the Sebastian’s he was always so invested in making sure that he created this environment of people that he felt would carry his legacy. It's almost like he knew that his date was near, and I think that he did a beautiful job of putting those people around him to ensure that his legacy lives on.
JCA: Initially, you entered the relationship as a “step” mother. For my part, I am not a fan of the word “step.” Nevertheless, you now (after having your first child) have a blended family. What has that transition been like?
AK: OK, so I wanna address “step” first if that's OK. I absolutely became a stepmother, and he is my stepson. I do find endearment in the term stepmother because I stepped in, I stepped into his life, and he stepped into my heart. So that's why he's my stepson. So, yeah it is step - we're steps. But we have the most important steps in the entire world. Now I wouldn't say we’re a blended family because they both have the same dad, they just have different moms, but I wouldn't say that there was necessarily a transition that had to happen when we had the baby. When it comes to my stepson he needs me, he's always needed me. He depends on me so much that I know that if he didn't have it, this perfectly amazing, innocent child, would be so messed up. So, when I had my son, I guess the only transition was, I think maybe Mama bear probably kicks in harder and especially now.
Like, man, the 5th grade was kind of rough, like I always look at my stepson and we tell him all the time how awesome he is, how handsome he is, like affirmations are big with us or drawing all over his mirror in a dry erase marker are all these positive things. His teachers love him, and they always give these great reports, and he wins awards, so we just always assumed like he was just this popular and cool kid, and everybody just loved him. So when I found out my baby was being bullied at school, the only other time that I felt that amount of rage, anger, and hurt was the first time I saw him cry over his mom saying that she was going to come and visit him and pick him up and she didn't come, she didn't call, we had to call her, and the look on his face broke my heart into probably a billion pieces. Then when I found out he was being bullied, that's probably the second time I ever felt that, but this time I was kind of a pro, so I knew not to break down, I knew just to go into straight action mode, and we got it handled and everything.
JCA: Have they ever seen/met the bully since?
AK: Me and the bullies are best buds. We're best buds me and all three of them. I chaperone their school for a lot of things and my opportunity this past year didn't come up until after the bullying situation. Ironically enough, after the bullying situation I'm the chaperone and these kids are like really hanging on to me and clinging on to me and starting conversations, I mean we have one of the kids, and I'm like “how are you bullying him and y'all got so much in common?” Like, but no they’re good friends actually and I'm hopeful to see what the 6th grade looks like for them. This happened all at the end of fifth grade, I'm excited to see what 6th grade looks like because I think that things are going to be a whole lot better for them. All the students that were involved.
JCA: LJ, a career in corrections, probably not what most people would think typically of a black man going into corrections, tell me about that, what's it like?
LJ: It’s interesting because I'll tell you this, I never graduated high school and said, “Oh I want to be a corrections officer.” I graduated high school, and I went into the military. I had a successful career in the Air Force, and I got out in 2008. If anybody remembers what 2008 looked like, it was shaky and it was a scary time to be getting out of the military at such a young age, with no civilian or adult experience.
I graduated high school, and I was in the military a month later, so as far as being outside of the military living on my own, doing things on my own, and then going in in a time where the economy was what it was. That was a scary time, but at the same time I said ‘listen I have this law enforcement background that I came from the military, I'm going to apply for every department in the nation and Las Vegas was the first one to call me. I packed up all my stuff and I moved to Las Vegas, I applied for North Las Vegas. North Las Vegas called me back first, I had to choose between patrol and corrections, I saw the pay was the same and corrections was hiring first, so I joined the North Las Vegas Academy in 2010.
North Las Vegas did layoffs in 2011, I went to the City of Henderson, I've been there ever since. What I will say, it's a different environment when it comes to laws. A lot of people don’t take into consideration the different laws and amendments that are applied to corrections. A lot of people don't understand that it requires the same temperament, the same crimes that happen outside, happen inside that environment. You must be a good detective, you must be a good investigator, and you must be culturally aware. It requires the same temperament, but as a black man in corrections it’s more than you think. It’s more of us than you think although we're not present, it’s well represented, it needs some work but it's better than what you think it is.
JCA: Has this been a good career for you?
LJ: It’s been a very good career for me, it’s provided me the opportunity to not only provide for my family but also make contributions to my community as well.
JCA: You know I talk to my son about how does he want to move forward and whether or not the military was a good option for him. When we look at the numbers and going to college being part of the National Guard, what that meant financially, it made good sense for him to explore that option. Would you encourage young men and women to explore joining the Air Force as well?
LJ: Absolutely. When I joined the Air Force, this is the decision I made I said ‘either I can go into debt,’ (because I didn't have a scholarship) for four years and then have to compete with this workforce, or I could go into the military for six years get a nice signing bonus, have free housing, gain a trade gain, get out in six years ,if I'm financially responsible I have a nest egg, I have career exposure, I have credentials, and I can still go to school for free.’ And again, this is at 18, so I'm thinking if it's the worst career that I've ever made, if it's the worst decision that I've ever made I'm still only 24 years old and I still have work experience, free education and I still have plenty of time to make up for whatever bad decisions I made, to make up time. So, you know, 24 is still a young person, so that was a decision that I made. I gambled on myself, and I won.
JCA: What drew you to AK?
LJ: You know what, I always thought AK was intelligent, always admired her and Franklyn's relationship, and this was before I even knew what anyone of them looked like. This was strictly listening to them on The Breakdown. I was always drawn to Franklyn because he was so intelligent, and he would always be speaking in a realm the average person wouldn't really understand what the heck he was talking about.
Then I hear this woman, to be able to interact, and she was funny right, and she was informative, and she was active in the community. She was all these things-that I thought these people didn't really exist in Las Vegas (just keep in mind at the same time I'm a transplant, I didn't move to Las Vegas until 2008) so I was still learning Las Vegas and I didn't know that these intelligent community minded people existed. So, I had always been a fan of AK when it comes to her as a person. And then I found out she was attractive; you know so that was a bonus, but ultimately yeah that's what drew me to her.
JCA: And when did you first begin to take notice of LJ?
AK: So, I remember, LJ and I had known each other for a year or so at this point and he had been volunteering at Mastering Mindsets. We collaborated on different things, but I was always looking past him. We were always working and involved, and one day we were standing in the parking lot of the Pearson…So, I had this issue, I had a single mother with three kids, and they were sleeping on the floor and just by chance I had somebody that had a queen size bed but the old school things where it had a heavy frame and all of that stuff, she's like but it has to be picked up today. So, I put my feelers out there, and the two people who responded back immediately were LJ and Tavon Patterson, they both met me over at Pearson.
We drove over to UHaul, they helped me get the truck, we picked up the bed on the whole other side of town, brought the bed back to the girl, they set it up for her. We left, went to take U haul back, and then we all went back to Pearson. So, Tavon must go because he must go to work. LJ then tells me that he just got off work when he saw my post on Facebook. For the first time in the whole time, we had been working together and things I said, “What do you do for a living?” and he said, “I'm a police officer.” and I swear I looked at him and was like “no you not” and he said, “Well what do I do then?”
I was like “Well, I don’t know, I didn't expect you to say that.” Well then, I started asking him all these questions and apparently, we were talking about this mishap on the radio that morning. We both had heard the same mistake on the radio where somebody was playing like all the R rated music with cuss words all on Power 88 and LJ says something in the reference that he made, I was like “Wait, where are you from?”
So, at that moment in that parking lot, I learned where he was from. I'm like “Wait you a country boy? Oh my God! You police officer? That's commendable, admirable, especially now and as a brother I'm like I wonder why I didn't know that.” So essentially, I got to know him and for whatever reason the sun started hitting his white T-shirt and all of his little muscles and like shoulder pieces we're like they were like beaming like I don't know if it was a new T-shirt, I don't know if it was freshly bleached, I don't know if he was taking his T-shirts to the cleaners, I don't know if he did like 32 pushups, I don't know if it was moving the bed up the stairs, but for some reason man's head got smaller and his arms got really huge and I started to realize I have not looked at this man passed his glasses like ever, I never really actually looked at him and then I realized I was attracted to him.
JCA: LJ two separate asks; because we get a lot of elected officials and business owners that are going to make the ask: How can corporate and elected officials support Mastering Mindsets? Second, I would like you to tell me how the community can support Mastering Mindsets.
LJ: Well as far as corporate, one thing about corporate I know, that they have individuals that tap into to a lot of different elements of professionalism, share that with the community of workshops. Funding is always the easy ask, but at the same time we still want to provide as many supplemental educational projects and classes for the students as possible. We still want to stay true to our mission and that's expose the youth to professional careers through supplemental education, so if you have those subject matter experts, bring those individuals, make them available let's sit together, let’s put together a schedule where we can put together workshops and bring students that's interested in that career.
Then also funding, when you donate to Mastering mindsets, you support AK's closet, you support Cause We Care Comedy, you support The Franklyn Verley experience, and those things.
The same thing applies when it comes to the average individual in the community. In addition to that, support Men Who Cook. One thing about Mastering Mindsets, we've always wanted to be able to say that the things that we provide to the community are free, but at the same time we must do a fundraiser. We take pride in being an organization that's not always begging for money but the one fundraiser that we do is Men Who Cook and at the end of the day we always going to promise you some great food, some great entertainment, great time, and some great fellowship and some beautiful networking.
JCA: When’s the next Men Who Cook?
LJ: It's still to be determined. It will be in the fall of 2023 I'm working with some individuals we just put together our sponsorship ad and donation packet and that will be coming out within the next 30 days.
JCA: Hey AK! Same question, how can corporate and elected officials help you and how can the Community help you?
AK: OK so elected officials can help by making themselves visible and present at events impactful to the community. Their presence absolutely matters! I would say not just waiting until the election season to make them more known to the community, it is what it is. I respect what they do in Carson City every legislative session, but I don't think that they're visible enough to the community when it comes to the work that they've done, and so then it ends up being a double edged sword; the community doesn't win because they don't want to be engaged in politics, and then I think that the elected officials feel a little jaded like “I'm doing all of this hard work for you all, help me out, vote for me so I can continue with my work” and it makes things a lot harder.
I say we try to put together events that allow the opportunity to educate and to disseminate information so show up, show up to the events - but don't just go to the ones that ‘oh you know this is a 80 year old organization’ and it's like OK, that's fine, but they had to start somewhere too you know? Especially if you see the impact in the heart of the people that are putting it together, and not to just jump on events just because you know that a lot of people will be there, like know the people that you're working with because my poor little community baby shower has just been turned into a money grab for people. That's not what I created it for and that's why I did not want to let it go, I don't want people to say, ‘Oh well the community wins as long as there's a bunch of them’ and it's like no you really don't understand what this looks like, it is really easy for the wrong people to get a hold of an idea like this. Moving on, corporate organizations don't follow the money that they donate, they'll donate money and then just leave it out there for ‘hey we did this’ and it's like, but you didn't show up to the event and you didn't even ask “hey are we the ones that bought those strollers?”
That's the thing that I love, when you show up to the event, I can show you OK, so you see those Pack N Plays, you bought six of those. Do you see the travel systems? All eight of those on that side of the stage are yours, not the three to the right because they bought those.” You can see where your money went, and I have no problem with that. That is something that I absolutely learned from LJ, when it comes to the way that he does business, check them - check them - check the receipts, check the records, check it again! I love how we have left every single community baby shower outside of the first one, we were still pregnant at that one, but we leave there and we have to go and buy stuff for our baby, we needed a brand new car seat after the last one because he was turning from the from the forward face to the back facing when we needed that, we needed diapers, and wipes…do we go and grab out of there? Absolutely not, we will pack that stuff up, take it, put it in our garage and storage and then go and purchase stuff for our child because integrity matters to us. So what I say to corporate organizations is follow your money, show up to these events that you're saying that you support and sometimes, a lot of times it's not always about the money that you can donate, sometimes offer up a space in your facility, offer up some hotel rooms that we can raffle off for a raffle and be able to raise our own money that way but that way people now are excited to come and be a part of it because they think we're gonna give away a Caesar’s suite or something like that you know. The Sands have the Convention Center do y'all have an extra closet in there that I can store my stuff in so Mastering Mindset can stop paying for AK’s Closet storage?
So, stuff like that and the way that the community can get involved is to prioritize your community events and organizations the same way you prioritize Beyoncé tickets, Bruno Mars tickets, and usher tickets! The same way that you can make plans and you don't have to cancel on those events for some reason, when those people are having concerts and these big events like that, y'all never get sick, the puppy never ate some chocolate that he wasn't supposed to, you never overslept, all of these excuses that you give to your community when it comes time to do the work.
It's time for the few to stop doing the work for the many, if every single person that benefited from the work that we do say I'm going to somehow contribute then I think that it would be in much better positions. I appreciate the mothers and the fathers who come to community baby showers not only with stuff that they want to donate because they receive stuff at the last one so now they want to come and donate stuff, but they come and volunteer and that makes you feel so good because that's what it should look like, they are so willing to come, ‘hey you guys help me when I was down, I got a job now, I just want to come and volunteer’ and I love to see those. A young lady a few years ago, Alex bumped into her while he was buying baby shower items, she was pregnant and she was almost in tears telling Alex “man I sure wish I had enough stuff like that” and Alex said “did you have a baby shower” and she said “well I did actually, it was yesterday and only two people showed up I didn't get anything, except some gift cards, so that's why I'm spending the gift cards in here.” So, Alex invites her to the community baby shower, we take a whole table and decorate it so that it's her baby shower. She didn't have to stand in line for anything, she gave us the list, everything that was on her list, we got her every single item. Ever since then that lady comes back, and it's so cute to watch that baby that was in her tummy come to the community baby showers with her. She's bringing stuff, she's volunteering, helping clean up, and that is what this is about, so community I say, “invest in yourselves.”
JCA: One last question, alright LJ, what piece of advice for young men reading this article
LJ: One piece of advice is every time that you have an opportunity to sit in front of an educator whether it's in school or in college, rather it's an Academy, rather it's just somebody that you admire, or somebody that you know has a load of wisdom, whenever they're speaking to you, automatically think how you can apply the information immediately, if its algebra, figure out a way to translate that information, or how you can apply it today. Do not just using it as a tool in your toolbox, but challenge yourself to use it immediately, and you will find out that everything is relevant all information is relevant.
JCA: Ak, one piece of advice for young women
AK: To look at yourself in the mirror look at yourself not through yourself. Gotcha! Look at yourself and admit to yourself, that you are enough, that you’re enough, in the state that you're in where you're still willing to grow, you're still willing to learn you are enough.
JCA: AK one last thing and I don't know how we made it through the entire interview, sitting across from you, whole time “those are stunning earrings” do you mind telling me where you got those wonderful earrings?
AK: I got these earrings out of my workshop where I make jewelry that can be found at https://www.thetreasureboxbyak.com.